Again, I Am NOT Andre Balasz

July 31, 2006

Two of the publications that I rely on most for up-to-the-minute news have recently reported that I am, in fact, Andre Balazs, or at least that we are identical twins that they are incapable of telling apart.

A couple weeks ago, the New York Post, my first stop every morning for everything, ran a photo of me frollicking in the waters of St. Tropez with Uma Thurman. I certainly didn't object to their running that photo and I actually would like to know why it didn't get better placement. But I was amused when they identified me not as Andrew, the king of television, but Andre, the king of hip hotels.

It's happened again. This time by People, in their newest issue in which Lance Bass comes clean with the stop-the-presses, headline news that he is indeed a homo. The breaking news for me was not about Lance and Reichen but when I turned to the "I Just Can't Quit You!" chart of couples who break up and get back together again. Amidst Pam and Kid Rock, Sienna and Jude, there I am again confused for the Hungarian Hotelier frolicking with Thurman!

Are Andre and I so alike that two photo editors could become utterly betwix'd and befuddled when sorting photos from their "St. Tropez, frolicking in" photo file?

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TGIF

July 28, 2006

"Project Runway" is everywhere right now, and it is exciting.

Pick up the new issue of People for a great profile of Michael Kors and see if you can find someone else in the mag that's not supposed to be there. (more on that Monday.) People have emailed wondering when Kors will be back - the week after next. He had a previous work commitment that excluded him from taping three episodes of the show and we were lucky enough to get Vera Wang to sit in his chair for those 3 weeks. We sure missed him while he was gone. What do you guys think of Vera so far?

Of course you can find out everything you need to know about "PR" at BRAVOTV.com, but I have to give a shout out to our friends at BloggingProjectRunway, who maintain an excellent fan site about the show. They do it for free, on their own time, and just out of love for all things Runway. One of the coolest things about them is that they have great respect for the show and it shows through the site.

Bravo, BPR! And thanks.
I am rambly today because it's been a long week. This morning, I was talking to Kristen Johnston, who's not only a fantastic actress but a massive RUNWAY fan. I asked her to throw out her thoughts so far on the designers.

"I think Kayne is interesting. I am just wondering if he can really pull out some non-pageantry designs. I think he's a good tailor. His cuts are good and I like his fabrics. He's got talent - you can see it. Michael Knight is genius. His dress this week was classic, I thought! Keep your eye on him. The redhead lady, Laura, is talented. I didn't like her coat with the chandelier stuff but I'll give her a pass. The girl that should've been booted last week - Angela -is a disaster as a person and a designer. I can't believe she got on the show. Keith Michael is a total train wreck that I am excited about watching. There's been rumblings about him so I am interested. And of course I am still madly in love with Tim Gunn."

Thanks, Kristen! He loves you, too.

I am still getting a lot of emails to my blog email box, which I love. Thanks to everybody for writing. I love knowing where people are from who read this and who they are. If you somehow found this blog and are coming back to it, then we have something in common and would probably like each other. That being said I am always amazed when I get a truly nasty email. If you hate me or the blog enough to let me know, then you must REALLY feel strongly. the option, of course, would be to never return to the blog instead of letting me know how you feel. This gem was in my box yesterday morning from LINDA:

"Andy - Is there ANY reason WHY I needed to know about your "ex" and his "friend"? What is this stuff??? Reading the "blog" you mention all of this NUMEROUS times.... Who CARES??? Do you need to include your personal habits with your job? Does it make your job any better?

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Sugar Kayne

July 27, 2006

We knew from the moment we saw Kayne Gillaspie's submission video that the firecracker from Norman, Oklahoma would quickly become a fan favorite. Three episodes in, I'm hunting him down to get up close and personal for you Runway fans. I spoke to Mr. Oklahoma moments before last night's episode ran...

HEY KAYNE! HOW'S IT GOING?

So good. Literally I think I'm on cloud 12. I love it. We're having a big public watch party to watch the show tonight in downtown Oklahoma City. I was on the news last week here....

WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?

I'm at my house getting ready! In Norman.

AND WHAT WILL YOU WEAR TO THIS EVENT TONIGHT?

Actually when I was in Vegas I bought a beautiful Hugo Boss jacket that's white and black and I love it. I will wear a black T-shirt and jeans too.

ARE YOU GOING TO WEAR YOUR "KAYNE" BELT?

I might actually! Good idea -- thanks, Andy!

YOU KNOW, YOU LOOK A LITTLE SEPARATED-AT-BIRTH WITH FRESHLY OUT OF THE CLOSET N*SYNC'ER LANCE BASS! HAS ANYONE EVER TOLD YOU THAT?

Yeah someone else told me that -- and especially since he got a nose job recently.

AND LANCE HAS REICHEN... DO YOU HAVE A REICHEN IN YOUR LIFE?

I do! I have Warren. He is also beautiful.

I WAS WATCHING YOU THE FIRST COUPLE DAYS OF PRODUCTION AND THROUGH EVERY STEP OF THE WAY YOU HAD THIS LOOK ON YOUR FACE THAT SAID "I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M ON 'PROJECT RUNWAY!'" DESCRIBE THOSE FIRST FEW DAYS FOR ME.

Like literally complete nirvana for me. Perfect peace. In awe that I am there. I am the biggest fan of the show and just to be there is just amazing. I tried to soak it in and believe I am there. I had auditioned last year and not made it. I was meant to be on this season, though, and I couldn't believe it.

WHAT WAS MOST SURPRISING OR SURREAL ABOUT ACTUALLY BEING ON THE SHOW?

Definitely that I could be as good as the other designers. I was stressed about going up against expert pattern makers or great sewers. I can sew but don't know how to use an expert machine. But I was there with great designers who had similar skill sets as me. Another thing that was surprising was how great everything was. I expected more turmoil being away and not having a cellphone, and it was actually fine.

DID YOU GO THE THE MISS UNIVERSE PAGEANT OVER THE WEEKEND?

I did not go. We had a huge party here. I had some stuff I had to finish for some other pageants and other work here.

HOW DID YOU THINK YOUR DRESS LOOKED ON TV?

Oh my gosh -- don't talk about it! I could not be more excited. I called Tara two hours before the telecast to wish her well via voicemail and she answered! We talked for a little and I wished her the best and I talked to her after. Out of 86 girls around the world I was so proud she made it so far. I could not have asked for a better girl to wear my gown after all these years in pageants. It was bizarre and crazy and so exciting.

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Project Runway Tonight

July 26, 2006

The challenge tonight on Runway is really fun and I want to blab all about it -- but I won't because it would spoil the entire episode for you. We try to make most of the challenges a "reveal" within the episode and are constantly in negotiations with our on-air and pr groups about what they can and can't reveal concerning each episode. Isn't it more fun to watch and be surprised than know what's going to happen? I am glad I don't watch soaps anymore because I can't imagine how any secrets are kept.

Last night I went to the Palm, which was packed to the gills with people like Barry Diller, Bruce Bozzi Sr., and an insane Cindy Adams look-alike. I was with some old friends and collegues from CBS News and got very caught up about all facets of life on West 57th Street. Working at CBS News was like going back to high school for 10 years. There were cliques and popular kids and assholes and lovable losers and overbloated self-importants and the science teacher you loved and the principal that wasn't your pal.

The headlline news over there seems to be that Katie has started work, the Evening News' new set is almost complete, and the Evening News staff is working out of the beloved basement cafeteria (it is literally called "Station Break") until their new workspace is complete. The idea of the staff of the CBS Evening News working in the cafeteria is endlessly amusing to me.

I started at CBS as a "CBS This Morning" intern in 1989 with a little lady called Julie Chen. Julie now anchors the morning show, is Mrs. Les Moonves, and hosts our beloved Big Brother. We didn't discuss "Big Brother All Stars" at dinner, but I went home and watched it after dinner. I am obsessed with Jase and what a jackhole he is. Every move he makes bugs me. Every bone in his body makes my skin crawl. Sometimes I email Julie hate-mail about Jase just because I feel like I have an outlet. She remains ever-diplomatic on the subject.

I still think the "all-stars" inside the house are very sad people who are desperate to be on TV but have nothing to say. "Chicken George" made a speech last night about how they are all all-stars with a wonderful opportunity to do-over something from their past. The cameras were showing the group as he made the speech and it was hard not to wonder if they were all-stars at anything else but being on Big Brother. Dr. Will made an impassioned speech to be kicked out of the house and I can't tell if he is so smart that he realizes what a bunch of dopes he's with and he wants to extricate himself from the show and re-embrace his dignity, or if he is playing them. In either case, I am hooked into this mess, damn it.

By the way, does anyone else have anything negative to say about Jase or is it just me?

Weekend Whirlwind ... in Flip-Flops

July 24, 2006

My flight from L.A. on Friday departed at 8 am and wound up being 12 hours because of weather in NYC and a re-fuel pitstop in Detroit. I was at the end of my tether. My flight attendant had ratty hair and a button that said: "Smiles will be Returned!" Coincidentally, my ex Morgan (see Friday's blog) was seated three rows ahead of me on the plane, which was helpful as he passed me half a xanax in hour two of the Detroit refueling.

Deplaning, I ran smack into a white-pantsuit clad Julie Chen, looking as fresh as a lady in a white pantsuit should, wearing no signs of airplane trauma. I'd missed "Big Brother All Stars" Thursday night, so she gave me the dirt on Nakomis' eviction as we walked the eighty miles in the American Terminal I ragged on in this space a few weeks ago. I was so rapt with "Big Brother All Stars"-level attention that I cut my toe on the escalator and my left-footed white Havaianas flip-flop became a blood-red flip-flop. That's what I get for wearing flip-flops on the plane, I guess.

My friend Kari was visiting for the weekend from St. Louis and patiently waited for my delayed flight in my apartment. She watched as I scrubbed my flip-flop and tried to pick up the pieces of the very delayed night with a late night artichoke and vodka snack at Florent.

Saturday morning I was on the Today Show with Campbell Brown. I decided that since it was WEEKEND Today, it would be perfectly suitable to wear flip-flips, bloodied and bandaged big-toe be damned. Is there anything more weekendy than the Saturday 8:30 half hour of the Today Show, and so don't flip-flips go hand in hand with that vibe? Maybe, maybe not. I was chastised by Bruce for exposing my dogs on national television and my dad made mention of it. My Mom, on the other hand, was obsessed with a protruding vein in my neck which apparently almost derailed the interview for her.

A man called Murray emailed the blog moments after the segment aired and said, "Did you actually get up this morning and think: "OK I am going on national television so I will wear flip-flops! Gimme a break you have shoes -- wear them next time. You weren't doing a spot for beach footwear that I missed were you?" No Murray, but it was WEEKEND Today and what's more beachy than that?

Someone named Mike from Vermont emailed and said "....it was all working for you: the polo, chinos and great flip-flops..." Thank you Mike, you are a man of great taste and style.

We drove to the Hamptons where Saturday night we attended a benefit dinner for Jessica Seinfeld's "Baby Buggy" Charity held at chez Seinfeld. The organization (found at babybuggy.org), in case you haven't heard, is dedicated to collecting and redistributing infant gear and clothing to families in need. They've redistributed almost two million pieces of baby stuff to people who need it!

The man of the house ribbed me mercilessly for wearing flip-flops to the party and said that, with my busted toe, there was really never better a time for me to be wearing closed-toe shoes. OK Murray, someone in the Hamptons agrees with you.

Sunday afternoon Bruce and I were slowly walking from my roadside driveway to the stairs down to my house when someone screamed "homo" out of their car at us! We were harassed in Sag Harbor! We quickly began debating which one of us was being called the homo. Our attacker had yelled "ho-MO" not "ho-MOS", so he was speaking singularly! So which one of us was it? Though I was in mid-sentence and potentially flailing my hands, I would bet solid money that it was Bruce.

In the meantime, I am indeed wearing the white flip-flops to work today.

From L.A. Runway and More

July 24, 2006

I was having drinks in LA the other night with my ex Morgan and his new partner when a flood of emails and texts came in from East Coast friends protesting Malan's auf'ing from Runway.

Kim in NYC said, "I'm shocked and saddened -- HOW could u drop him (with all that difficult ruching...as hideous as it was) when she was such a child?!" Ralph Lauren exec Charlie, watching on a business trip in Florida, texted simply: "It should have been Angela." A famous lady emailed, "I'm so sad. So heartbroken. That was wrong."

I get it y'all. Malan had such potential as a designer and someone who would be fun to watch on the show that none of the producers (or I) wanted to lose him. His elimination was toughest for us, I guarantee you that. For those of you who will at some point tell me that we kept someone for ratings or character, I will mutter my fave new six letters, m-a-l-a-n. The fact is, the judges hated his dress and thought that it was completely wrong for the given challenge. They hated it much more than they blamed Angela for her behavior with Vincent.

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Several friends wanted to know if Angela is the new Wendy Pepper. I don't see the resemblance but I think people want to put Runway designers into a category based on past designers. The guy to ask might be my fellow Bravotv.com blogger, and Runway producer, Michael Rucker. He's writing a blog on the Runway page that you should definately check out. I would like to take this opportunity to systematically trash and destroy him because he is too cute and too smart and now that his blog exists mine is redundant and sad. And because looking at his pic above his blog makes me want to get a blue-eye transplant. I won't systematically destroy him though because I like him, he is a good producer, and his blog is so fun and well-written that I just have no grounds. So yeah, check it out.... IF you have a stomach for that sort of thing. Ladies, he is str8 and single, single, single. Rucker, I'm watching every move you make, partner.

After dealing with the heartbreak of the East Coast the other night, I returned to my drinks with the ex and his current, who are living their own Runway lives.....

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Morgan and Stewart are the men behind Morgan Grays, the hot new line of luxury leather accessories and luggage for discerning men of style and taste with some extra dollars to spend. Morgan left his career as an investor relations exec in order to form the company with his designer-partner. Their stuff is sweeping white-hot stores across the country. Would you believe M-G leather is in the window of Fred Segal right now? Me neither, but it's true! I love a fashion success story. And I love it that Morgan found a good Jew.

I couldn't help flipping out the other day driving down Santa Monica Blvd when I spied an enormous "Work Out" billboard several stories above. We've been working on the show for a while so there's always a weird moment when it actually hits and becomes real.

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Before we started shooting I figured that the best way to get to know what Jackie was to have her work me out. She kicked my ass as I tried to get a sense of who she was. She is so gorgeous that it's hard to stay focused on lunges and abwork! I am thinking that this is the first reality show that follows a gay woman trying to have it all. Stay tuned for lots of drama to come from her relationship and her trainers. Lots of firsts in that show!!

It was a great week in LA and I capped it off with an especially fun day on the set of "Top Chef" where the kitchen is superb and the chefs inside raise the level of talent from last season bigtime. Two episodes in they are already mixing it up.

I can't help sneaking in a pic of me and our pig-tailed new host Padma Lakshmi from the set yesterday. This should be the last I talk about it until the show premieres later this year, but I am so blabby that I might just tell you all the challenges now. Fortunately, I have to go moniter Rucker's blog....

Do I Look Like Andre Balasz?

July 12, 2006

I have returned from my vacation in France to reclaim my identity, which has been stolen by the New York Post and replaced with that of a Hip Hungarian Hotelier. You see, Sunday's Post ran a pic of myself frolicking on a St. Tropez Beach in front of Club 55 with Uma Thurman. No crime in their running that picture and frankly, why on earth wouldn't they want to run a picture of a TV guy who nobody knows with a blond superstar? Hilarity ensued when they identified me as the Hungarian (I kinda look it) frequent Thurman boyfriend (not a bad mistake) and hotel magnate (I like the title) Andre Balasz.

I spent my Sunday incredibly hung over on a boat in the Mediterranean (not the ideal place to be hung over, actually) oblivious to my fame in another man's name. When I checked my emails late Sunday, Nina Garcia -- herself still under the St. Trop sun at Club 55 -- was the first to alert me of the pic and made no mention of my identity theft.

To walk into Le Club 55 is to fall in love with it. The paparazzi camp out on either side of the beach to catch Thurman-like frolickers. The photos that would really tickle me to see are those of myself, Sir Ian McKellen, and Liam Neeson searching the St. Trop coastline for my glasses, which washed away as I was in mid conversation, literally still talking about the "Confessions" tour and still passionate enough that I could allow my specs to disappear. We looked forever and got some Swedes and Germans in on the hunt, but never found them.

We ate and drank (and drank) so well for the last 10 days. Lunch my fave -- light salads (nicoise!) or fish (loup!) followed by the most buttery lettuce and a cheese course that consistently sent me reeling. All washed down with the lightest rosé imaginable. Why are the French and their rosé so civilized and why are we and our diet coke so not?

We watched the World Cup finals Sunday night in the heart of a postcardy French Villlage, La Garde Freneit. There were TVs set up in the town square and some of us hung in a local bar (above) and others watched in the town square. The head-butt heard round the world didn't go over well in this little town. My friend John put it best when he said we'd all just witnessed a superstar disappear from a Wheaties box.

We flew home yesterday and John and I spent most of the (nine hour) endless flight obsessing over our flight attendant, Claudia. Her hair was so hot it could set off fire alarms, her smirk said "I know something that you don't," and her stewardship and master of the cross-check and bev service was pure gold. Claudia, wherever you are, thanks for making us feel right at home yesterday.

MA-DON-NA!!!!!!!!!

July 07, 2006

The sold out crowd at Madison Square Garden was doing "the wave" well before Madge hit the stage, a sign that her opening night in NYC was going to be memorable.

My partners in Madonna were Graciela, John, and Bruce -- all of us (inadvertantly) wearing jeans with varying styles of navy blue shirts. We looked like we'd been styled (by Herself?) to go to the concert together. It was a mob scene passing through security into the Garden and we found ourselves walking next to recent gay-bash victim and performer Kevin Aviance, looking fierce but with his mouth wired shut.

The buzz-kill moment of the night happened early when we saw our friend Ron approaching us, heading against the crowd. He dejectedly told us that his tickets were for July 2nd and he didn't realize it until Mr. TicketTaker shamed him in front of the Tower D kids. B u z z K i l l !!!!!!

The crowd inside was insane and the Garden was steaming hot. We were told that Madonna's goal was for everyone to feel like they're out dancing in a club, thus the steam heat. We loved it.

She entered from a disco ball descended from above and for two hours had the packed house jumping, screaming, and grinding. She sang a ton from the new album and weaved in disco classics like "I Feel Love." Somehow the backbeat of "Music" became "Disco Inferno" and we thought our heads would blow off.

There were Material Girl staples like a cross and a blown shofar and lots of horses and the hustle and her whipping her dancers and videos about AIDS and a juxtoposition of Bush and Hitler and all the other fun stuff that goes along with a night at Madonna's.

There were a lot of highlights: An insane version of "Ray of Light" had 19,000 people jumping up and down in unison... her last single "Sorry" was a surprise tour de force packed with a jam... and the final four songs were a 20 minute dance-off featuring "Erotica," a dance mix of "La Isla Bonita," the old chestnut "Lucky Star" which fed right into a THUMPING ender in "Hung Up."

It was nonstop dancing, lasting about two hours. We were completely soaking wet at the end. The floors were wet. Everybody stunk.

Madonna "Part Deux"

July 06, 2006

Remember watching the movie "Truth or Dare" as Madonna took her dancers post-show dancing in small, exclusive discos? That was where I wound up last weeek: right on that dance floor with M and her posse.

The night started back at Madison Square Garden as a friend invited Bruce and me as his guests for night deux of Madge's tour. We were sitting directly in front of a sidestage where the lady frequently appears, most notably riding a horse and singing "Like a Virgin." Bruce and I (people call us "Brandy" when we are together -- get it?) were happy for the opportunity to just sit back and watch the show without getting all caught up in it and dancing our faces off. That didn't happen, we were up shaking it all night.

Seated to my right was a nasty mafioso henchman wearing a red silk button down and a frown. He'd brought his slave -- I mean girlfriend or wife -- with him and they were in misery from the moment they arrived. He stood still as a statue until I inadvertantly stepped on his toe during "Sorry" when he physically revolted, pushing me/slamming me into Bruce. I had found the one guy with bad energy in the entire Garden and he was about to pummel me for invading his personal space at a flipping gay-faced Madonna concert. Dancing in place for the rest of the song, I apologized to him after it ended. He responded by raising his finger, and the stakes. "You respect me, and I'll respect you," he warned. "Those are the rules."

The rules! The RULES? There are rules at a Madonna concert? Why was this thug murderer even AT a Madonna concert? Bruce switched seats with me and the guy split in the middle of the concert to beat the pulp out of his companion.

The show was a sweaty triumph all over again. If you're inclined to read more, and lull yourself to sleep, today's New York Times features another classic non-review-review that kind of deconstructs the whole evening and takes all the joy out of the event.

After "Hung Up" thumped away and the lights were turned up, our companion took us to a small gathering that M herself was hosting. Slowly, her dancers started arriving. We talked to all of them, trying to go along with their supercool handshakes and soaking up their energy. They are, of course, having the time of their lives. Who at one point has not wanted to be one of M's dancers? Bruce and I wanted to be them badly.

The lady arrived, wearing a sequin shirt that read "You are not on the list." (It both figuratively and literally said that.) Brandy kissed her. We chanted her name. She asked where we were sitting and we complained that she gave us no eye contact. "That's because you weren't jumping high enough!" She responded.

The rest of a night is a blur and it's hard to put a high so high into words. It puts it into a box rather than a feeling. Suffice to say, we danced our faces off all over again, the lady hit the floor when Michael Jackson came on, we talked to A-Rod and had no clue who he was until he walked away, watched Kevin Spacey make a spectacle of himself, and a Brazilian asked me if I was one of Madonna's dancers, which capped the entire event for me.

The Lady left after a few hours. We stayed behind with the dancers. There were no rules.