Driven to Distraction
I have dreams and goals and stuff to do around the house. These are the things this week that kept me from getting to any of it.
Lofty Ambitions: The Finale!
April 11, 2007
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Note: I wasn't allowed to see the final moments of the "Top Design" finale. But I sure as heck watched it last night at home along with everyone else. No spoilers here, you'll have to scroll all the way to the end to get my comments about who really won.
Show of hands: Who among us hasn’t fantasized about living in a loft? It just seems supercool, right, all that space and natural light and exposed pipes and stuff? I blame the movies of the 80’s for making loft living look so glamorous. I want Demi Moore’s Billy Idol mural from St. Elmo’s Fire, room to crawl across the floor naked and degrade myself like Kim Basinger in 9 1/2 Weeks and a dance barre like Jennifer Beals had in Flashdance. Okay, technically that was a warehouse, not a loft, but you get the point. The way I see it, a home ain’t a home unless you can do “Maniac” in it without having to move the couch. The only downside to loft living would be trying to watch porn while your roommate’s home. Maybe that’s what video iPods are for.
Given my love for lofts, I was very excited to learn that for the finale of “Top Design,” finalists Carisa and Matt are going to be tricking out identical 1,700 foot lofts in downtown Los Angeles, an area that Todd claims is totally on the rise. And, Todd adds, they’re going to be working for their “most difficult clients ever.” When he says this, a cavalcade of notorious showbiz pains pass through my mind. Maybe Naomi Campbell could be assigned to Matt. He’d have to do all his sketching while she threw cell phones at him. And Carisa could get Mel Gibson. All he’d do is drink, change his mind about everything and call her "Sugartits," as in, “I don’t like the color of those accent pillows, Sugartits.”
On a side note, I think Sugartits would be a fun name for a breakfast cereal.
Matt and Carisa are relieved to learn that the “difficult clients” are actually themselves. They get even more excited when Todd tells them that the prize package includes a new GMC Acadia. The designers act as though this is news to them, but haven’t they known all along that the Acadia was part of the deal?
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Author of "Screening Party" and "Misadventures in the (213)," Hensley shares his daily distractions here. He's also co-host of the radio show Twist and his website is at dennishensley.com
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Comments
Natalie wrote:
I think Carisa was robbed... The judges were hot for Matt from the very beginning. Don't get me wrong, I love Matt's style but, the master bedroom looked out of place right there in the living room and I think he designed the loft around the kid. There wasn't enough of a family area. Carisa's loft was fun and stylish and I don't know anyone who wouldn't want a "bed pit". IT WAS FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted at April 12, 2007 02:54 PM
TM wrote:
You are very talented. This is the funniest blog entry I can remember reading. Why don't they tell people how funny you are?
I think Carisa should have won, too, but my gripe is that they gave Todd so little airtime. So sweet and genuinely insightful, right? But I wish he'd drop that emo-twink look. Not flattering anymore and many people (me me) like the way mature men look.
Thanks very much for the blog.
posted at April 12, 2007 08:00 PM
~*~katie~*~ wrote:
natalie i agree 100% i was really hoping that the judges would have looked at the two designers styles and taken them for what they were. matt was always very predictable as far as his designs and even though carisa had an obvious "style" she always brought something fresh and new. i loved her loft and would have moved into her space in 2 seconds! :) so congrats on the win matt but i think when it comes down to it, carisa is def. the top designer.
posted at April 13, 2007 08:48 AM
Jon A. Leslie wrote:
This was a one weird finale. Matt's room was good (sans the bedroom- blech!), Carissa's was better overall (the "bed-pit" was genius!) and what was truly devastating was, when Matt won, they used "old-fashined" drink glasses versus flutes for the champagne. Isn't that a drinking faux-paux? Why didn't they just chug some "Old-English" 40 ouncers & smoke some crack? How ghetto of them. He-he!
posted at April 13, 2007 03:23 PM
Rick Nelson wrote:
Our reactions were pretty similar, Dennis; the degree may be different*, but..well, here they are in no particular order:
I think Carissa should have won...her place had a vital personality, while Matt's (once again)AGONIZINGLY well-appointed space felt soulless (once again), even with his ham-handed excess in the "Princess Room"*. PLUS, Carissa's obvious growth as a designer should have been rewarded over Matt's staus quo. I believe what happened was that Matt's style is the one that Elle Decor was always most comfortable with, so he was fast-tracked all along. (no offense to Margaret, who I also admire and respect; but however powerful she is, there has to be a committee somewhere to which she answers); Lastly, Matt's obviously-not-in-jest "was there ever any doubt?" reaction was crass, ingracious, and given his weekly hissy fits over the chance that he MIGHT lose, hypocritical.
Now *at the risk of hijacking this from a "comment" and into my own blog, here's an aside I have to include: What is up with Matt??? Dennis, you've been great throughout TD's run in pointing out, >ahem Okay, I read Andy Cohen's "Watch What Happens" blog in the middle of this tirade, and apparently there was an appearance of The Wife, and she seems to have been rather convincing...of course, Andy IS an Executive, so he wouldn't want to cause too much controversy either.
Hm, maybe I SHOULD start my own blog; I never consciously realized what an opinionated blowhard** I am.
**intentionally provided for the use of anyone who disagrees with the above.
posted at April 16, 2007 12:57 PM
Rick Nelson wrote:
Giving OutZone the benefit of the doubt, that I was EDITED for space, and not CENSORED, I'm adding a second comment that replaces what was removed between the ">ahem Dennis, you've been great throughout TD's run in pointing out, >AHEM In retrospect, my own opinion has shifted: Matt's behavior goes BEYOND gay...it almost seems as if he's a female-to-male transsexual who hasn't quite realized that (s)he really should thought twice before taking THAT step...
Okay, I read Andy Cohen's "Watch What Happens" blog...
now THERE are the opinions that should get me in trouble. Thanks for the space, Dennis & OutZone!
posted at April 17, 2007 10:08 AM
GoryDetails wrote:
I'd have to agree that, of the final two, Carissa's design seemed more interesting - although as the task was to design the lofts for themselves I think that made the playing field way too uneven. [And I was really embarrassed on behalf of Matt's daughter; even if she really does love pink-and-purple princess-themed spaces, that was a bit much!]
But what I really want to know now: Dennis, now that Top Design is over, why aren't you reviewing something else? Shear Genius is wildly flawed and could do with some of your wonderful skewering!
posted at April 18, 2007 11:22 PM
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